What a Bummer, Kristen!

SPU was robbed of glory by the devil's hencemen (including, but not limited to Chris Mathews.)

You all know Kristen Eddings, former SPU student, co-founder of SPU's college republicans. Well-loved Ashton student. Currently Miss Washington, and until last night a potential Miss America. It seemed like nothing could stop her rise to glory.
Lifting the banner of God and SPU and Country for all to see. What better platform than Miss America to let your light shine, as a city on a hill, there is no greater hill or city than the title of Miss America.

However some people don't think so. Who are these crazy people? Kristen dominated in all categories. It seemed like she had it in a pinch.

Then, out of nowhere she's called out. Yanked out of the competition. WHY? What forces prevailed. Whose power exceeded that of even Chris Matthews?
I think I have a Good Idea. There is a group of people aiming to dismantle any kind of rise to the top. They brazenly proclaim: "There is no ranking here; we are all equal in the eyes of God." This should be a wake up call for all of us that some people do not like SPU. They do not want us to succeed.

I don't know who is behind this "stop the madness" campaign. But I want you to take a look, a good long look, at Kristen's face. Look to see how happy she is. And know that you, yes you, took that away from her. You took it away from her, her family, and our school.

Homecoming Theme

Steele-y boy decided the theme for the homecoming should be "Can a university change the world?" which is totally lame but made even lamer because he stole that idea off of all the banners in the martin square! (seriously, he did. go check it out!)
I said the theme should be "Can a university funk the face off of a city?" and we could have my hip-hop group "PFunk and the Munchins" raise the roof and then bring the house down at the homecoming game after party.

He said a hip hop theme wouldn't be in line with the thrust of the university. Which clearly meant to me that our goals are off. I mean what are our spu goals? Sitting still? Being Sober? Reading? Lame. Lame! LAME! totally lame.

This is the year of the reign of funk at SPU. Tell the spu jazz band to pick some new tunes. Give up the kenny loggins and bust out the george clinton. I mean the guy has the names of our last TWO presidents, so you know he is cool AND important.

Falcon Awesome

The Seattle Pacific University "Falcon Awesome" campaign is, in a word... "AWESOME." I am proud of our school and I am glad that students are proud to be here too. Some "debbie downers" like les steele and the ASSP apparently think SPU sucks. But we, we here at Falcon Awesome, know that SPU is Falcon AWESOME and that BIOLA is the one that sucks. (repeat: SPU=Falcon AWESOME. Biola=SUCKFACE) medina says repition is the key to learning or something, I mean, I was playing psp but for your sake (repeat: SPU=Falcon AWESOME. Biola=SUCKFACE). If anyone wants to buy me a t-shirt I will so totally wear it to the next board meeting and flash it in the face of the trustees (nothing says "wazzup, bitches?!?!?" like a falcon awesome t-shirt. And this pretty falcon awesome) cause they need to catch the SPU school spirit fever, known to the coolest of the cool as "falcon awesome."
The only place the falcon awesome campaign failed was in its limited vision for how falcon awesome SPU actually is, which is pretty falcon awesome.
T-shirts and tailgate parties? Don't get me wrong, those things are falcon awesome, but you know what would be falcon awesomer?
keggers. pumpkin milkshakes at red mill. gorditos season passes for falcon awesome club members. remote controll blimps at all falcon awesome basketball games. falcon awesome mascot vs. local sasquatch sonics mascot in all out falcon awesome mascot cage match. a giant, falcon awesome burning-man-style effigy of clyde cook falcon awful president of falcon awful BIOLA.

In the end we all learned what was truly Falcon Awesome (Falcon Awesome) and was truly lame (1. ASSP executive members. 2. Les Steele 3. Books. 4. ASSP in general. 5. Clyde Cook, BIOLA, et al)

peace out my falcon awesome home-dogs!
-Pdzawgh


P.S. I think you're falcon awesome! ;)