Un-De-Lite-Ful

The Mrs surprised me with a lunch date. I had to quickly stash my big macs in my desk drawer. It was hard because I had to make room amongst all the malomars, which take up most of my desk space and the space in my breifcase. I think she might have noticed.

Its finals week so the C-store was pretty empty. Usually at the end of finals week all the students come in to celebrate and take all the good flavors of jones sodas and ben and jerry's ice cream. But today, being the first day of finals, it was pretty well stocked.

But, oh man, The Mrs would have none of it, and what's worse? She wouldn't let me have none of it either. She made me order a 6 inch veggie de-"lite." It was hardly delightful. Nor was I full. At least let me get the footlong! In addition to the veggie-only sandwich, I had to have a "Nantucket Nectar" which at first I though was cool, but when I found out that Steven Weber nor Tim Daly had nothing to do with it, I lost all interest. And a double bogus came when she made me get veggie chips instead of potato chips.

"How did you endure?" you ask, "was it the spirit of the Lord leading you on?" No, my friends, it was all okay because I knew I had three big macs, and two fries, and a chocolate shake back at my desk.

But then bummer, dudes and dudettes, I knew that the shake would be gone, but when I got back to my desk, all my snacks were gone. The Mrs totally set me up! While we were out eating Les came in and stole all my stuff.

What are you gonna do with all those malomars, Les? Reap their intended joy by eating them? No, you won't do that. You'll probably resell them to the students, but not before you inflate the price by 3 or 4 hundred percent. And which crime is worse? Taking in the beauty of God's creation of malomars or robbing the young, innocent, and naive?

Distraught in Demaray,
Phil